I have friends around me who have been single for awhile now. They always go into self depreciation saying how unattractive they are which they perceive is the reason for their single-hood.
I have been consecutively in two long term relationships for the past 6 years. People always think that it is a big part of their life accomplished by being attached. For me, while being attached, sometimes I also date myself. Yes, you heard that right!
So much of our life outside work was filled with things that most of us do not enjoy doing. Surely, that needs to be changed. We are so often occupied pleasing everyone else without knowing what really made ourself happy.
There are more than one way to enjoy single-hood:
1. Put on a dress, apply some makeup and escort yourself to a movie which you have always longed to watch but cannot find anyone to go with all this while.
2. Take yourself to the beach with a good read and some good light snacks, do not forget the music.
3. Book yourself an appointment at the spa to keep your body in a relaxed state.
4. Retail therapy is a girl’s most effective mood-uplifter. If you are on a tight purse string, window shopping is just as therapeutic!
5. Do you realize that sometimes you do not even know yourself well enough? Now, take sometime off after a long day’s work. Sit down with some soothing music in the background and evaluate on your life.
“Who do you want to be?”
“What do you really want to do?”
“What are your future plans?”
6. In order to find a more suitable partner in future, you should also sit back and evaluate on your past relationships so that you do not keep hitting your head in the same brick wall each time when you are in a relationship.
Ask yourself questions:
“What were the problems you faced in the previous relationship?”
“Why made me commit to the previous relationship?”
You do not want to change yourself too much to suit someone who very different from you in a relationship. Many women in their late 30s and 40s have decided that although they long for someone to come home to, but they will not settling for just anyone. Many single women these days also have a mindset that “life is great in this modern world with equal rights, great jobs and vast opportunities. We no longer need man to protect us or make an impact on our life. Staying with someone for the sake of it is just a waste of time!”
Dating yourself could teach you many things – What you really enjoy doing, who your true good friends are, what is most important to me. This period of single-hood allows you to travel well and deep as well as focus on building your career.
Bear in mind, you are not going to find the best person for yourself if you are not being who you really are.
After getting to know yourself better, you will definitely find that person whom you just know you will spend the rest of your life with. Then, you will save some time on relationships which will not bear fruits and stick to the right path all your life!
“A real relationship, whether it is with a friend or a lover, is about finding someone who brings out the best in you, enjoys the best in you and loves the things you love.”